How do I do that again?

Have you ever created a piece of art that you can't stop looking at?  The one that makes you wonder if you can ever do better?

I have at least one of those.  The elusive "how the heck did I do that?".  I painted my favorite painting at a retreat in North Carolina at Donna Downey's studio.  I remember struggling with this painting.  Everyone else seemed to know just where they were going with their pieces and I couldn't find it.  I had stenciled, splashed paint, drizzled ink, every trick in the book, but I just couldn't figure out what was hiding in there.  

I remember feeling overwhelmed.  I know my emotions were on edge also.  This 4 day retreat had required a drive from Florida to Virginia to drop my son off with his grandparents.  That allowed me 6 child-free days.  These were not guilt free days though.  Although my son was having fun, he missed me and that made me feel the mom guilt.  

Then on top of that, this painting wouldn't cooperate and just tell me what it wanted to be.  

I can't remember when it started making the turn, but one time I looked at this crazy abstract canvas and I knew what to do.  

Ever since I have been in love with this painting.  It has hung just inside my front door or over my bed since I brought it home.  I entered it in a local art show and won People's Choice.  I love it so much I had part of it tattooed on my arm.

Now I must figure out how I did all of this?  Can I recreate the magic (without the tears)?  I will keep trying.